Took a nap, cleared my head. Maybe what I should do is, instead of giving him platitudes like, "we're just not compatible," or some shit like that, I should say, "Oh yeah, like, I was sexually abused and now I'm pretty messed up and your behavior sets off my triggers. I'm on thirty percent disability for depression from the VA and if it weren't for my antidepressant meds I'd probably have off'd myself already." That way, he'd go, "Oh holy shit, that was a narrow escape!" and there would surely be no argument.
Sorry, depressive humor.
In the category of young whippersnappers, there's a hot guy in my German class. He's the one I mentioned before who speaks German very well, but that's incidental. Now why can't *he* ask me out? He could probably teach me a few things. *cough, choke, splutter*
While I dislike the whole "Rules" thing, bottom line is this: every time I've tried to initiate something with a guy, it didn't work out. That's unanimous --*every* time. So I'm not asking any guy out again. But how come the only guys who ask me out are alcoholics or control freaks or something? How do I let an attractive guy know I'm interested? Face it, I'm socially undeveloped.
I guess -- and I'm getting kinda sick of saying this but it's true -- the age difference is a real factor. Maybe one day when I'm done with college … oh, who gives a shit? Why am I even thinking about this? I've got so many more things to worry about.
Buh-bye now.
posted by Newpeep, N.D. (neurotic depressive) @ 8:12 PM
1 Comments:
Yeah, I hear ya. I can never show my interest to people who I'm attracted to. And those that are attracted to me are usually freakies! But then I've been attractive to some really hot women. Go figure.. doesn't do crap for a gay man. :)
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