Now I understand why my brother's always got the sniffles. Asthma makes you build up phlegm in your lungs, and when you take your medicine, it all comes up.
The kittens are feeling good and ornery. Newman and Peep are chasing their tails, even. Missy never showed symptoms of the temperature she had. Eating like a little piggy and molesting the fish.
[Isn't "molest" an ugly word?]
For the past three or so nights in a row I've forgotten my Wellbutrin. Damn those twice-a-day tablets. And then yesterday I didn't take my AD's at all. Feel okay today, a bit sluggish but that's not out of the ordinary.
Spent all day yesterday, and I mean, all day, from 10 a.m. until 11 p.m., reading Gone to Soldiers by Marge Piercy, and that was only the last third or so. I'm on a Marge Piercy kick, can you tell? Gone to Soldiers is no light read. I fucking love that book. It makes me feel as if I can understand what it was like for people during WWII. I think it's genius how she was writing about such varied people in contrasting locations with differing viewpoints. It took her seven years to write that book.
A momentous occasion: I made some tuna helper in my own kitchen. A hot meal I didn't get at a drive-thru.
I cleaned my fish tank, a task long overdue. I'd bought a new betta, unusually beautiful for a pet-store fish. I'm pissed at myself, though, because when I transferred him into his new tank I tore his fin. Fuck! It'll never grow out as pretty as before. While I was cleaning the tank, Missy and Peep were pissing me off, sticking their paws into everything. Finally I flicked water in their faces, yelling, "Git, git, git! You want water so much, take it in the puss." That worked. Peep took off with much indignation and stayed away, and Missy only tried one more time. She looked at me in amazement, "How can you do that to my charming self?" Anyway, it's nice to have at least one little task done that had been put off for a long time.
I might run later, outside. I haven't worked out in at least a week and exercising outside is a nice change of pace.
Time to work on dollies, try to bring in some "coin," as Eduard liked to call it.
I was reflecting yesterday how now I could really use the money that I'd spent on Eduard, particularly the car battery I bought for him. What kind of a man lets his girlfriend buy him a car battery and not reimburse her for it? Someone with no pride, for one thing. A sense of entitlement, for another.
I've got the radio on for some background noise, despite the fact that all the local stations are owned by the same corporation and they're homogenized, risk-free, repetitive and dull. I first noticed corporations buying out local stations in about '98. They've absolutely ruined radio, trashed it. Leached it of any uniqueness or personality and closed the door to any band not in the mainstream, even in those so-called "alternative" formats. Bah. I used to love listening to the radio. I'll never forgive them for taking the joy out of it.
Eh, I'll play some MP3's instead.
11:50 p.m.
God I'm so tired. All I did today was change the fish water and paint a doll. I started off working on a Tonner and wound up on another My Scene. I wonder why I prefer them. Probably because the standards aren't as high and I can be cartoony. Man. Now it's time for bed because I actually have to be somewhere tomorrow morning. It'll be the first time I've left my apartment in a couple of days. I'm a stinky girl but the shower can wait until the morning. There's no one around here to offend.
posted by Newpeep, N.D. (neurotic depressive) @ 11:37 AM
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